The idiot superclass

(WARNING: I’m sufficiently annoyed to have invoked The Charlie Brooker style in this article)

The human race has got this far not by being inherently superior to other animals, or by being of above average intelligence and physical stature. Homo sapiens are, in general, a bit shit. We’re one of the stupidest, most depraved, illogical and violent species on the planet. We haven’t got this far through collective endeavour: the only reason we’re not extinct is due to the extreme efforts of an enlightened few, who strive to work against the general mob of idiocy and self destruction.

This enlightened few, contrary to what certain political and supremacist groups would have you believe, is not specific to a particular sub-group of humanity. I’m not talking about Western civilisation, or indeed Asian or Arab or African civilisation. Quite the contrary: the enlightened few are scattered through history and throughout the globe, peppered through the general population at all levels. Equally, in all areas of human society, regardless of skin colour, gender, education, sexual orientation, class, politics, nationality or anything else, there is a seething morass of utter worthlessness. The massive inertia of this mob continually threatens to drag the entire species down – this is the idiot superclass, which overrides any other division in society. Idiots are all-pervasive.

‘Idiot’ certainly does not necessarily mean uneducated. As the saying goes: Knowledge is understanding that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing to not put it in a fruit salad.

So, it’s been one of those weeks. I’m a bit grouchy.

Kicking off with Nick Griffin’s appearance on BBC Question Time, which was as amusing as it was galling, it’s been one incident of the idiot superclass throwing their weight around after another. Take James Parkes, for example, a 22 year old trainee police officer who is currently fighting for his life after a collective group of the idiot superclass decided to attempt to destroy his head in a violent attack outside a nightclub. A gang of up to 20 people took part in the apparently unprovoked assault. Why? Because Mr Parkes is gay.

A member of the idiot superclass can be easily identified by a strange fixation on irrational prejudices and completely disproportionate responses to them. In this case, an irrational hatred and fear of homosexuals. The idiot superclass can’t just quietly stew in their own filthy ignorance: they have a need to spread it out into the world. In this regard they’re much like a disease, infecting all those around them with fear and hatred – and anybody that is immune runs the risk of being simply destroyed. It’s where zombie fiction comes from, basically. The idiot superclass is a far greater threat than global warming, giant asteroids or nuclear armageddon. Actually, the latter example would be mainly due to the idiot superclass, so scratch that one.

To take a less violent but equally insidious example, let’s take a look at Pauline Howe. She’s a grandmother from Norfolk who also has a problem with gay people. So much so, in fact, that she wrote to Norwich city council to complain about a Gay Pride march in the city. The letter was passed to the police as a possible hate-related issue due to its content, and Granny Pauline was interviewed by officers, with no further action taken. End of story? Did she learn her lesson and rise up to be one of the enlightened few? No, she instead took her story to The Daily Telegraph, because she can’t take a hint.

That’s another key trait of a member of the idiot superclass: they’re almost completely oblivious to their own faults and mistakes, often because they’re too busy attempting to blame somebody, anybody else. It’s inherent to the group, because without it people would only temporarily be a member of the superclass as they gradually absorbed more information throughout their lives. It’s a resistance to this new information that puts them in the superclass to begin with and then keeps them locked into the mentality indefinitely. Reason and evidence is irrelevant when they’re so convinced of their own righteousness.

Annoyingly, and rather tellingly, the full content of the letter she wrote has not, to my knowledge, been re-published, only select snippets – no doubt the less virulent segments, so as to successfully spin the situation against the police, the council and gay people in general. It makes it impossible to have a proper, reasoned debate with the woman – which is, of course, very deliberate, as a reasoned debate would very quickly highlight the tragic flaws in her outlook on life, religion and other people. Even the small snippets published by the Telegraph are fairly abhorrent, though. Check this out:

She described homosexuals as “sodomites” and said “their perverted sexual practices” were responsible for spreading sexually transmitted diseases and “the downfall of every empire”.

That’s right, people. GAYS DESTROYED THE EMPIRE. See what I mean about the idiot superclass always blaming other people, whether it makes sense or not?

Astonishingly, Howe claims that “she was merely expressing her religious convictions and was not homophobic”. She seems to be under the illusion that if you attribute your idiot rantings on religion it somehow exempts you from judgement. She’s not really homophobic, because she’s actually just following her religion. It doesn’t count. Much like the 9/11 terrorists that flew planes into the World Trade Center weren’t really terrorists – they were just expressing their religious convictions. You know, the conviction to be total arseholes.

Religion should not be invoked as a get-out clause that allows you to behave horribly towards others. Leave religion out of it: the problem lies with the individual.

The other great thing about the idiot superclass is that they often completely, utterly miss the point due to an irony deficiency. Also from the Telegraph article:

Mike Judge, of the Christian Institute, said: “Whether people agree or disagree with Mrs Howe’s views, everyone who cares about freedom should be alarmed at the police action.”

“Everyone who cares about freedom”, eh? You’re absolutely right, Mike! I absolutely do care about freedom and I’m very alarmed at the police action. I’m alarmed that they didn’t take the matter any further, given Howe’s apparent determination to restrict the rights and freedoms of gay people who are peacefully expressing themselves. After all, she did write “It is shameful that this small, but vociferous lobby should be allowed such a display unwarranted by the minimal number of homosexuals.” If you’re talking about freedom, you should look a little closer to home before pointing the finger at the police, Mr Judge.

The only positive thing that comes from the idiot superclass is their inadvertant hilarity. They are, after all, exceedingly funny. However, the amusement factor is inversely proportional to the strength of the opposing enlightened few – the mob is only entertaining while they remain powerless. And that’s why the BNP-on-Question Time debate is so crucial. And why everybody needs to get out and vote at the next elections. Let’s turn the enlightened few into the enlightened many.

It is worth it, despite the odds. As Morgan Freeman says at the end of Seven:

Ernest Hemingway once wrote, “The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.” I agree with the second part.